We are all products of our experiences, both positive and negative. We can all look back on our childhood and recall sad or painful memories, but for most of us, those experiences were not traumatic enough to cause long-term problems into adulthood. But for some people, adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) can continue to impact them for years, sometimes without the person realizing the connection.
Sadly, childhood trauma is all too common in our nation. Many children witness or are themselves victims of physical or sexual abuse. They may live in a community plagued by violence. Many children experience emotional or physical neglect. A child may also be traumatized by natural disasters, the death of a loved one, bullying, or living in financial instability. Being passed around between family members or in the foster care system, even if they are loving caregivers, can impact a child negatively and become a part of subconscious thought.
How an ACE affects a child varies significantly, depending on the child’s personality and other life experiences. Not everyone who witnesses a deadly car accident or is abused as a child will develop serious issues in adulthood, but few people go unscathed. In my experience, I have found that the determining factor is whether the adult can recognize the effect the trauma has had on his or her life and can integrate it into his or her life story in a healthy manner. Few people can do this without the help of a very experienced therapist.
Healing childhood trauma’s long-term effects
As a psychotherapist in New York City, I have worked with many adults dealing with the consequences of childhood trauma. ACEs or childhood trauma can lead to emotional problems such as depression and anxiety; destructive behaviors such as substance abuse or eating disorders; difficulty in developing healthy relationships; poor self-image or self-hatred; and even health problems.
Two of the most powerful methods of addressing and overcoming the effects of childhood trauma are psychodynamic therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy. After getting to know a new client, I discuss the options with the client and recommend the best route.
Psychodynamic therapy: Psychodynamic therapy is a deep and sensitive exploration of problems and issues affecting your life in order to understand your unique history of thoughts, relationships, and behavior patterns. Uncovering the origins of behaviors and emotions leads to the potential to resolve them in a safe environment and an ability to make more conscious rather than reactive choices.
Cognitive behavioral therapy: This form of therapy is a concrete approach to uncovering automatic thoughts that lead to specific behaviors. By becoming aware of your thoughts, insight is gained as to how and why choices are made in life. Some techniques include relaxation exercises, mindfulness homework, positive thinking, self-talk practices, and journaling, all of which help you positively retrain automatic reactions and thoughts.
The effects of childhood trauma take time to heal, and you need to be patient and gentle with yourself as you go through the process. I encourage clients to have a strong support system of friends and family or a support group of others who understand what you have experienced. If you are in the NYC area, I am here to help you navigate the healing process. I have seen many clients overcome the effects of their childhood trauma and be able to develop healthy, lasting relationships and live happy, healthy lives. It may take time, but healing is possible.