The stress associated with infertility comes from many different directions. Recognizing the sources of psychological stressors is the first step to combatting them. As an individual or couple struggling with infertility, you have medical professionals addressing your physical health, but you may also need a professional addressing your mental health.
Can stress cause infertility?
I’m sure you’ve heard the well-intentioned but painful advice, “Just relax and you’ll conceive.” There are certainly anecdotal incidents in which women who cannot conceive during a period of stress are able to conceive when the stress has passed, but this is not always the case.
Studies have suggested, however, that improper functioning of the thyroid and the hypothalamus-pituitary-adrenal axis can lead to an increase in depression and anxiety, which can in turn, impact fertility. Other studies have found an association between depression and abnormal regulation of hormones that control ovulation.
While studies are ongoing, there is enough evidence to suggest that one’s mental health can decrease fertility and therefore should be carefully managed.
Impacts on mental health
Infertility can cause a wide range of emotional responses in both men and women, though they often cope differently. Frequent emotional responses to infertility include:
- Depression, anxiety, mood swings
- Guilt or shame, blaming yourself
- Blaming your spouse or partner
- Feeling like your spouse doesn’t understand or doesn’t know what to say or do to help you
- Low self-esteem, feeling defective, inadequate, or a failure
- Jealousy of people who easily conceive or who have children
- Stress, hurt, or anger from unsolicited advice, thoughtless words, and misunderstanding among family and friends
- Anger or hatred of your body
In addition, infertility treatments and the very process of assisted reproduction can cause significant stress, depression, and anxiety, through a number of mechanisms:
- Fertility drugs: Hormone treatments to improve fertility or bring about ovulation can impact your mood, cause sleep disruption, anxiety, depression, hot flashes, and other unpleasant side effects
- Physical pain and discomfort from the medication or medical procedures
- Juggling appointments, taking medication at just the right time
- Tracking bodily symptoms, which can make you hyperaware and focused on your body, increasing body anxiety
- Feeling intimacy has become a project rather than a spontaneous act of love
- Trauma from frequent failed attempts, especially with IVF
Protecting your mental health and your relationships
If your mental health, marriage, work, or relationships are suffering from your struggles with infertility, therapy may be a way to alleviate some of the stress. Find a mental health professional who specializes in treating couples dealing with fertility issues.
Your improved mental health may also increase the success of your treatments. Several studies on the effect of cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) on couples dealing with fertility have measured both a decrease in anxiety, depression, and anger as well as an increase in fertility rates.
As a psychotherapist in New York City, one of my areas of focus is infertility counseling. I utilize psychodynamic and cognitive behavioral therapies to help couples and individuals develop coping skills to manage stress in order to stay healthy while dealing with fertility issues. Contact me today to see how I can help you.